James Holbeck
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Presentation Topics

The presentations can be aimed at and adapted for schools, sporting teams and youth groups.

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Great few days challenging perspectives at Port Macquarie's own Luminosity Conference for 15-25 year olds. Thanks to @katewoodfoye & team for their amazing organisation & opportunity to speak to tomorrow's leaders! #luminosity2016

A photo posted by Jimbob Holbeck (@hope_beckons) on Jul 22, 2016 at 5:07am PDT

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​Alcohol Identity: The good, the bad and the ugly of Australian drinking culture!
Whether we agree or not, Australian culture writes us into a narrative that losing control of our senses on substances is fun & normal. Legally however, being affected by alcohol and drugs is not an excuse for behaving inappropriately. We are still responsible for those decisions.

The approach of this presentation is to look at the different reasons people use substances and balance these motivations against their own long-term goals and behavioural ethics. This includes a basic understanding of how substances affect our brain's decision making processes. Weaved within the research-supported presentation is the personal testimony of James becoming a problem drinker before compromising his dream of playing rugby for Australia and finding a way to stand up for what he believes in rather than be a slave to alcohol and a dancing monkey wanting to appease other people's interests.

The message is not one of do or don't drink, it is of becoming responsible for your own decisions, finding effective coping strategies to deal with setbacks and to increase self-efficacy to say no when you don't want to drink or you've realised that alcohol is compromising how you want to live your life. It also examines shame in the context of substance abuse and addiction.
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Key Outcomes:
1. Identify motivations for substance use. 
2. Weigh up the positive and negative reasons for use.
3. Understand the neuropsychology of alcohol on the brain.
4. Develop self-efficacy and party strategies around drink/drug refusal.
5. Understand shame cycles around abuse and addiction. 
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Key terms: alcohol identity, motivational interviewing, ethical practice, refusal self-efficacy, shame cycle.
 
"James has a natural way of relating his own personal experience with an impressive knowledge to students in a way that is engaging. He manages to communicate deep issues in a way that doesn’t isolate or offend students but rather invites them to be proactive in the decisions they make around alcohol and party culture." (Caitie Humphreys, Trinity College, Beenleigh Campus Minister)


Emotional Resilience: Learning to express what you need to at the right time & in the right way!

 Harden-up! Don't let fear hold you back! How we are expected to express our emotions seems to fluctuate between advice saying to keep it all hidden inside to other advice suggesting we should just let it all out. In the process we often hide the emotions we need to express & express poorly the ones that are best controlled. What if we learnt to be more resilient in behaving according to our ethical system and goals rather than being reactionary to our emotional brain. 

Interestingly, anger for example is a normal emotion that has been so constrained in society that some people when it needs to be expressed either don't know how, so hold it in or feel like it overcomes them and so go into a rage. This presentation or workshop challenges the heart of what is defined as strength to come to a healthier understanding of sadness, shame, anger & hope.

Emotional strength then starts with an understanding that emotions should be expressed appropriately - in the right way & at the right time. This takes practice and scenarios are developed that can be used to help participants practice implementing their new knowledge & skills.

Key Outcomes: 
  1. An understanding of emotional states and how they personally experience these: such as shame, anger, grief and joy.
  2. Examining resilience & grit in regards to a basic understanding of emotional and rational brain components.
  3. Understand character and self-worth as an antidote to shame.
  4. Develop strategies of being in control of their anger.  
  5. Challenge the mantra of 'harden up' for all scenarios to reveal when grieving is necessary and how to ask for help. 
  6. The basic formula for finding hope and joy!      

​Mutually Respectful Relationships: Learning to respect others even when you disagree!

The art of functioning relationships is to be able to turn towards each other in difficult times & work together, using each others strengths and understanding and respecting different values in order to work through these times. Respect is often lost when we elevate our own needs over those needs of others or impose and project our views on how others should see a situation. Sometimes this can be subconscious but by recognising these challenges in ourself we can expect deeper & more meaningful relationships.

​But why? As we understand our sense of self we no longer have to bow down to our neediness or ask others to fulfil a sense of who we are. We come into a relationship not needing to pretend to be someone else in order to be validated, accepted or impose ourselves but can offer our self from the best of us. The basis for then working on a healthy attitude towards others including race, culture, gender, sexuality, etc, is found in understanding that all people have inherent value and are therefore worthy of respect. 
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Other topics:
​​*Finding Your Voice as a Leader: Even when you're not in a position of Leadership
​*Making Your Decisions Great Again!

Men of Substance - Men of Character! (N.B. Can be adapted to specific values or virtues of schools, sporting teams or groups of young men 14+) 
Some in the media have stated that to say..."Be a man"... to boys is a destructive message. This has to depend on how the message is being received. What if a clear  message was being reinforced:
  • Be a man 100% responsible for his actions.
  • Be a man of respect who understands both how to meet his needs while also understanding interpersonal boundaries.
  • Be a man of emotional regulation that can grieve, seek help and learn to control their strong negative emotions.   
  • Be a man that empowers others with hope.
  • Be a man who has a vision and is resilient to see it to its fruition. 

​Why is integrity the most important characteristic we carry? Because it holds the key to both subjective well-being & being true to yourself. Do you have the character to carry your talent? We are all trying to work out what we believe is right according to our ethical system and then walk consistently to those. But what happens? Like most people, at some stage we become a dancing monkey! Dancing to the pleasure of what other people wanted us to be or we dance according to our unmet needs.

The journey to developing men with character is to be 100% responsible for every decision you make. To understand what you stand for and walk accordingly. Not being a chameleon that changes its colours for every environment & then feels down for not standing for what they believe in. Finding strength in themselves but also in having good friends, mentors or other support networks to stand strong in the arena of life!  

Endorsement:
I cannot thank James enough for his excellent presentation to the students in our program. He was able to tailor his presentation specifically for us, making the session even more meaningful for our students. 
His messages about personal character, integrity and mental toughness took our Core Values from words on a page, to principles to live by.
Paul Stanley: Rugby League Coordinator
Wavell State High School

Faith Topics
James makes a point of speaking respectfully about his own Christian Faith where asked. Typically he speaks about his personal testimony of feeling lost in life, having no clue who he was, of struggling with alcohol and ultimately finding peace in the last place he ever wanted to be and that made him feel the most awkward - church. James can also present his general topics through the specific lens of Christianity where asked. 

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